HumourGator

• List of people almost given the chance to turn down honours leaked
• Werewolf!
• Evra gets 24-hour protection from cheeky Scouse wit
• Phase one complete, Dacre tells home planet
• Sally Morgan to be represented by disembodied voice of Abraham Lincoln
• BBC4 named ponciest channel at National TV Awards
• The days are getting longer, say cheerful dickheads

• Next King of Scotland declares the country will use the Air Miles as its currency
• Agony Aunt - "I am a closet cross-dresser"
• UEFA Allows Wayne Rooney To Be Violent Against Ukraine
• Apple Overjoyed As iPhone 4S Passes Turing Test In Scotland
• Ex-Pats Flood To UK For The Weather
• Supporters of Liam Fox Deny Anyone Would Volunteer To Be Near Him
• Iconic Palin 1.0 discontinued - US downgraded in world lunacy rankings

• Somali pirates blame ‘Health and Safety gone mad’ for downturn
• Woman's promotion finally allows family 'to eat like benefits claimants'
• Concern over ever-expanding OED
• Lowly bank employee wins £7.7m double rollover jackpot
• Continued male one-upmanship leads to first ever 'stag year'
• Garage flower display may be in line for top prize
• Clowns demand pay rise for appearing in children’s nightmares

• TV Listings: Piers Morgan: The Animated Adventure
• Australian Open Canceled As Tennis Balls Fall Off Bottom Of Earth Into The Sky
• American Voices: Oklahoma Bill Would Ban Use Of Fetuses In Food
• [video] Embarrassed Steven Chu Accidentally Calls Barack Obama 'Dad' In Cabinet Meeting
• Statshot: What Are We Replacing?
• New Law Prohibits Kaleidoscoping While Driving
• Magazine: Are Bugs Mad At Us?

• Gamers could avoid war crimes prosecution due to ill health, low shields
• 100 bureaucrats ‘invaded’ Gallipoli commemoration: God help me, I was only APS Level 6
• Rudd ready to ‘forgive and forget’ what a crap prime minister he was
• ‘Shoplifting’ senator damages Australia’s relations with Foodland
• Remains of Channel Nine careers found in bushland
• Victims slam McDonald’s drive-thru ramraider: ‘I hope he fries for this’
• Rapist denied flood award may miss out on Australian of the Year too

• Romney To Gingrich: Enjoy It Now, You Fat Fuck
• Schools Rail Against New 'Hexting' Fad
• Weapons-Grade Plutonium Price Hits All-Time High
• Glass Of Red Wine Helps Women Ward Off Asshats
• Study: Nickelodeon Writers High 22 Hours Per Day
• [audio] The Disciplinator
• Solyndra Solar Panels Mistakenly Gave Sun Energy

• Don Cherry, the Piano Man
• How Court Reporters Have Embraced Technology
• If You Can’t Say It, Express It Thru A T-shirt
• Top 21 Things to Do in New York When You're 21
• Plastic Poppable Solar Pool Covers
• I Think We Love Bacon More Than We Should
• Life Insurance Is Not For The Living

• Next GOP Debate Offshore? Hillary Done with Politics? Demi Moore in a Huff?
• Obama “Can’t Wait” for SOTU, and He Won’t; Will Announce Next Bailout of American Icon
• After Iowa Reversal, Can Romney Stop Santorum Juggernaut?
• Obama Picks Bainie for OMB Boss, OWS Pickets Obama’s House
• Taliban Moral Outrage at Corpse Urination Video, Plus Michelle Obama Tweets
• Romney Celebrates, Gingrich Whines, Huntsman Erupts, Obama Fears Paul
• Tim Tebow Kneels to Ask Forgiveness

• TV Choice: Sitcom special!
• UK economy: 'Have you tried turning it off and turning it back on again?' asks Gates
• Daily Stir: Blackburn boss in Young Boys raid
• Daily Stir: Chelsea can't afford Hulk's rampages
• 40 is the new 50, devastated women told
• Daily Stir: Michael Owen could come out of retirement
• Tesco celebrates one millionth accidental BOGOF full charge incident

• Researchers Find Link Between Obesity; Calories
• Facebook Offers Solution to Privacy Concerns
• John Boehner and Eric Cantor Abducted by Aliens
• Barefoot Bandit Secretly Inks $5 Million Movie Deal
• God Apologizes To Herman Cain
• University of Texas Offers George W. Bush $1000 for Speech
• Herman Cain Defends Harassment Claims

• Cameron Throws Weight Behind Campaign To Change Fred Goodwin's Whole Name
• US Election 2012: Are Americans Baldist? When Was The Last Time They Elected A Sexy Bald President ?
• Letters To The Editor - Sherlock Holmes Death Special
• Beepgate: Prominent TV Chef Arrested After Failing Tesco Self Service 'Beep!' Test
• Balls Grabbed Miliband By The Testicles And Shouted "We're Doing It My Way"
• Letters To The Editor - The Thun
• [Daily Armstretchograph] New Call For Cameron To Apologize For Attack On 'Annoying People'

• Rick Perry: If You Could Choose A Non Copyrighted Superpower What Would It Be, And Why?
• Newt Gingrich: If You Could Choose A Non Copyrighted Superpower What Would It Be, And Why?
• Mitt Romney: If You Could Choose A Non Copyrighted Superpower What Would It Be, And Why?
• Cartoon: Romney And Gingrich Discuss The Benefits Of Super PACs
• January 2012 - Funny Horoscopes
• World Voices: Scientists Have Discovered That Elephants Have A Sixth Toe. Have Your Say
• Christmas Voices: Chocolate Coated Brussels Sprouts... Have Your Say

• Baltimore Ravens Kicker Blames Missed Field Goal on Do-Nothing Congress
• World Celebrates Alec Baldwin’s Return to Twitter
• Rick Perry Says Romney Beat Poor Elderly Woman with a Polo Mallet
• Gingrich Campaign Denies Hiring Man to Stare at Mitt Romney During Debate
• Jesus Christ Signs $100 Million Contract with Denver Broncos
• Macy’s Fires Another Santa Claus
• Barney Frank In Salary Negotiations For Elmer Fudd Role

• Justin Bieber Performs Michael Jackson, James Brown Rolls Over in Grave
• Demi Moore 'pulls a Clinton', swears blind she did not 'inhale'
• Heather Locklear Told To Check Herself Into A Rehab Clinic or Risk Being Deported
• Nancy Pelosi's "Secret" About Newt Revealed
• Coming and Going? - L.A. Porn Merchants Prepare To Withdraw Troops If Local Condom Occupy Plan Officially Takes Hold Of Their Collective You Know Whats
• Warren Buffett's Secretary Arrested For Panhandling
• Newt Gingrich campaign promise: colonize the Moon with Mitt Romney supporters

• Hilarious Tory Post-Ironic Wartime Poster Parody Craze Seizes Internet
• 'Decent, Hard-Working Families' Exposed As Spiteful Daily Mail-Reading Desk Jockeys Contemplating Divorce
• Archbishop Spreads The Word 'Cunt'
• Britain To Reinforce Falklands Garrison With Diane Abbott
• MI6 In Race To Develop Spying Dog Turd
• Nev Filter Annoys World By Staying Online
• Unions Urge Labour Party To Cut Disability Costs

• "PUPPETS TO THE PEOPLE: JUJU"
• "PUPPETS TO THE PEOPLE: JACOB"
• "PUPPETS TO THE PEOPLE: HELEN"
• "PUPPETS TO THE PEOPLE: TIM"
• "PUPPETS TO THE PEOPLE: PDV"
• ZA NEWS IN A MINUTE (test)
• ZA NEWS DAILY 26/11/10

• A Royal Yacht, Hurrah!
• Royal Murder Mystery
• Animal Magic
• Apes a Go Go!
• Editorial: Look Back in Sleaze
• Fruits of Treason
• Stalking Santa

• Latest Poll: Newt’s ‘Campaign’ Against Saul Alinsky May Backfire
• Mitch Daniels’ SOTU Response: Give Me Another Chance to Wreck the Budget
• Newt’s Response to Obama’s SOTU: Tax Breaks for Spilled MILFS
• Romney Loses Iowa, S. Carolina, But Claims Surprising ‘Win’
• Professor Gingrich Provides Alibi to Marianne’s Charges
• The Part of Marianne Gingrich Interview That ABC Left on Cutting Room Floor
• New Book About GOP Race: ‘Primary Coloreds’

• Pujols explains hit-and-run-call: Craig was a 'distraction' at first base
• America shocked that Arabs still hate us
• Fearing a return to sexual duty, wives of Milwaukee teachers union urges court to deny Viagra claim
• NTSB to recommend installation of U.S. senators on every GA aircraft
• Kentuckians Marvel at Electricity Service
• Ordinary Person Spots Celebrity
• Sept. 11 mastermind was waterboarded 183 times in delousing effort, say former Bush administration officials

• Why Dr Batra is a Padma Shri
• Jagdish Tytler Allegedly Condemns Jay Leno For Hurting Sikh Sentiment
• Indian Condom Company Does Its Best to Improve Cricket Team's Morale
• The Curious Case of #barkhabarks
• Why Some of Us Have to, Regrettably, Defend Salman Rushdie, A Bad, Incompetent Writer
• Cow Slaughter and Bullshit Laws
• Cute Puppies And Dumb Dog Lovers

• Gathering In Davos? A Waste Of Time As Far As Most People Are Concerned
• Is Libya Descending Into Civil War? It Looks Like It
• People Pushing For Drug Laws To Be Relaxed. There Must Be A Catch In It Somewhere
• Changes In News Reporting Urged To Help People Who Develop Addiction To News
• War With Iran Is Inevitable Unless It Caves In To Western Pressure
• Asking: Has The Private Sector In China Any Future?
• If He Were A Fireman George Osborne Would Have Been A Lousy One

• Roy Hodgson finally admits that being an owl is getting in the way of managing West Brom
• Try-hard white man insists he is "totally down" with the African Cup of Nations
• Court hears Harry Redknapp habitually orders water when getting his round in
• Wacky Mario Balotelli delights nation with cheeky stamp on Scott Parker's head
• Wronged Rhodri Giggs demands Ryan Giggs' place on William Hill window display
• Manchester City's indifferent form put down to Roberto Mancini's obsession with imaginary objects
• ...">Has football become racist again?

• Aging Gingrich Sucking Life Out of Youthful Santorum Race
• North Korea To Recycle Kim
• Recycling Republicans
• Steve Jobs returns as Hologram
• Anderson Cooper Set to Propose to Kathy Griffin at Midnight
• An Up Close Look at Australian Animals From Hell
• Random Pointlessness Takes the World by Storm

• The Obvious Conclusion
• We’re Not Racist, We’re Just Cunts
• The Worst Show On Earth
• Poor Reception
• We Call It The Shitter Over Here, Thank You
• Leave Britney Alone
• A Little To The Left

• Daily Star Blames Muslims For Rain
• Latest Al Qaeda recruitment video “basically a Justin Bieber video” say experts
• Gadaffi restores Libya internet access to check comparethemercenary.com
• BBC Asian Network “not doing enough to attract white, middle class listeners”
• Wikileaks urged not to publish plot to Cats and Dogs 3: Feline Good
• UK economy losing billions due to time lost by employees “pausing for effect”
• France grinds to a halt as nation asked to work until 5:05pm

• Recap - Week of 1/23/12
• Indecision 2012 - 2012: A Space Oddity
• A Love Supreme - Profanity & Nudity on TV
• A Love Supreme - Religious Freedom vs. Americans with Disabilities Act
• 1/26/12 in :60 Seconds

• Just for Openers
• Case No. 6 - Mario Monte
• (United Kingdom) Credit Where No Credit is Due
• (Australian) Showing Promise
• (Australian) A Promising Future
• (Australian) Carbon Emissions as of 27th January 2012
• In the Pipeline

• Idiots of India sue The Hindu for mocking them in advertisement
• Indian team to carry their own pitches for future foreign tours
• Mayawati's missing shoes were thrown at Rahul Gandhi
• Musharraf to declare himself a terrorist for safe return to Pakistan
• Subcontinent teams agree to play cricket as “East Indies”
• YouTube moves video clips of Indian innings into "tragedy" category
• Man jumbles television channels to miss morning telecast of Perth test

• NRA Cites Rep. Giffords as Proof that 'Guns Don't Kill'
• Costa Concordia
• Cat's Meow Doesn't Wake Sleeping Family in Apt. Fire
• Romney Wants U.S. Tax Revenue Paid Directly to Him
• Newt Gingrich Sues Satire Website
• Dog Travels 1400 Miles Back to Its Old Cage at Animal Shelter
• The 10 Greatest Jobs of 2012

• John Terry To Release Michael Jackson Cover Single
• Downing Latest Misunderstood Liverpool Victim
• The Diary Of Andrew Gray 55 3/4
• Allardyce Assembles Gaffer Squad Vigilante Force To Take On London Rioters
• Suarez’s Sweet Gesture Lost In Translation
• Redknapp’s Post-Match Rant In Full
• Peter Ridsdale’s Skin ‘Made Of Teflon’ Claims Scientist

• TheSkunk.org - Ad for Costa Concordia Gives Promise of New Coral Reef
• The Chicago Dope - Mitt Romney Vows to Start Having Affairs